Cranky Old Aunt Robert - poem

  

 

Lawrence Hall

Mhall46184@aol.com

Dispatches for the Colonial Office

 

Cranky Old Aunt Robert

 

“I just don’t go to funerals anymore,” he said

Oh, he was all right, the town’s bachelor lawyer

He was just like that, as everyone agreed

A bookish old lawyer and the town eccentric

 

When we were young, he and I read Paradise Lost,

Along with Friend Tod, of happy memory

But with time he recused himself from life

And had me ‘phone him about the town doins’

 

“I just don’t go to funerals anymore,” he said

But a week or two later

                                            he did

Your Words, Your Way - poem

 

Lawrence Hall

Mhall46184@aol.com

Dispatches for the Colonial Office

 

Your Words, Your Way

 

At the end of the day, your words, your way

Now healing and sealing the wounds of your friends

Giving grace and peace to the Vespers hour -

We open your book and look, and read your joy

 

At the beginning of night, your words, your light

Through your verse rehearse the teachings of peace -

They are to us a healing waterfall of dreams

And then a covering warm with autumn-night stars

 

Now you sleep too; this soft blanket is for you

For your happy dreams, sweet and true, all night through

We See Stories as We Walk - poem

  

Lawrence Hall

Mhall46184@aol.com

Dispatches for the Colonial Office

 

As I was a-walking One Morning for Pleasure – 

We See Stories as We Walk

 

 

From “Git Along, Little Dogies”

-American, traditional

 

 

The road doesn’t end here, but something did

In the lonely dark, with a cigarette and beer

A can of Miller Lite drained out last night

And a cigarette end, to mark an end

 

An end to love, now faded in the sun

One of each, not two, an empty man

Going home alone, stopping here a while

And wondering why his everything went wrong

 

The road doesn’t end here, but something did -

And maybe there’s a job waiting in Wyoming

Is There a Thai Army Knife? - poem

 

Lawrence Hall

Mhall46184@aol.com

Dispatches for the Colonial Office

 

Is There a Thai Army Knife?

 

 

“A man’s not dressed without his pocketknife”

 

-my father, and surely yours

 

 

At Christmas friends give me Swiss Army Knives

Precisely engineered with all those nifty tools

A most useful adjunct in all men’s lives

For camp and work, this little gadget rules

 

Most days I carry my British Army Knife

Rough and tough; it’ll take it on the chin

The workman’s friend both in peace and strife

(Oh, golly-gosh, the hinge is broken again!)

 

What knife is carried by a Thai G.I.?

Does the Garuda or Elephant adorn its grip?

When guarding a great nation’s land and sky

A soldier needs a blade of fine craftsmanship

 

And in peace, too:

 

It’s true of every worker, all through his life -

A man’s not dressed without his pocketknife

 

(Just ask your father)

He was a Cute Little Boy - poem

 

Lawrence Hall

Mhall46184@aol.com

Dispatches for the Colonial Office

 

He was a Cute Little Boy

 

And on occasion he was told no

          “One…”

Sometimes he was yelled no

          “Two…!”

Sometimes he was yelled no again

          “Twooooo…!”

And again

          “Twooooooooo…this time I mean it!”

Sometimes he was screamed no

          “Twwwwwwwwwoooo!  DON’T MAKE ME GO TO THREE!”

And again

          “Threeeeeeeeeeee! I SAID THREE! YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS!”

But then

          “Okay, one…”

And then    

“Two, if you’ll tell your sister you’re sorry…”

And then

          “OKAY, MISTER, THREE! AND I MEAN IT THIS TIME!”

And then

          (“Honey, don’t you think you’re being a little rough? Now you’ve made him cry.”)

 

And then years later the state superior court told him no

          And they didn’t yell.

          And they didn’t say “one”

          And they didn’t say “two”

          And they didn’t say “three”

What Does an I.C.E. Agent Do on His Day Off? - doggerel

 

Lawrence Hall

Mhall46184@aol.com

Dispatches for the Colonial Office

 

What Does an I.C.E. Agent Do on His Day Off?

 

He might want to pause and meditate

Upon the 4^th and 5^th Amendments (they’re in the file)

And the children he locked behind a barbed-wire gate

 

Or

 

He might prepare his defense for his Nuremburg trial

 

[The pronouns “he” and “his” are gender-neutral. This certificate of pronoun compliance is provided for Dr. Karen, Ms. Grundy, and the alligator-shoe boys at Target corporate.]

A Crude Review of my TV Service Provider - doggerel

 

Lawrence Hall

Mhall46184@aol.com

Dispatches for the Colonial Office

 

A Crude Review of my TV Service Provider

 

Unplug and re-set, wait for the blue light

And wait and wait – and now the controller’s not right

Our TV service is known as Spectrum

Which, as you know, rhymes with r****m